A Small Move Took Everyone Down

I was watching speed skating the other night during the Olympics. One of those tight, fast races where everyone is packed together, leaning hard into the turns.

Midway through the race, one skater made a sharp move. Not malicious. Not reckless. Just slightly off. Maybe rushed. Maybe frustrated. Maybe trying to force something that wasn’t there yet.

It took out two other skaters.

The replay slowed it down. You could see it clearly. One small move under pressure rippled outward. A few seconds later, multiple people were on the ice, sliding, out of contention.

What struck me wasn’t the mistake. It was how quickly one person’s moment became everyone else’s problem.

That happens off the ice, too.

When we’re overwhelmed, tired, or in a bad mood, our margin for error shrinks. We cut corners. We react instead of respond. We rush a conversation. We fire off a comment. We bring our frustration into a room without realizing it.

Suddenly, others are dealing with something they didn’t cause.

Most of the time, we don’t intend to take anyone out. We’re just trying to get through the turn we’re in. But pressure has a way of narrowing our awareness. When that happens, we stop noticing how close other people are to us.

The cost isn’t dramatic. It’s subtle. A teammate shuts down. A conversation goes sideways. A relationship absorbs impact it didn’t need to.

When you notice that edge rising, the impatience, the tight chest, the urge to push or snap, don’t try to fix the situation yet.

Do one simple thing.
Widen the turn.

That can look like pausing a few seconds longer before you speak.
Asking a neutral question instead of making a point.
Taking a short break before responding.
Saying less, not more, in the moment.

You’re not avoiding the issue. You’re creating space so your mood doesn’t become someone else’s collision.

What if, when you’re feeling overwhelmed or in a bad mood, you chose a steadier line so you don’t take someone else out with you?

Read on If You Manage and Coach Others
From time to time, we need to coach people whose pressure is impacting others. I put together a short post with a few tips on how to do that well. Read here.